11 - She'll just launch this craft on the tide of complaint

[no_fastolfe]

[Filtered to Rassilon, Rinzler, Rhade, Seven, Martha, and Dracula]

Though some of you already know: I can now say, conclusively, that Sherlock Holmes, my warden, has left the barge.

[She looks very chilly as she says this, haughty and unaffected.
Please ignore the tension in her neck. She's being emotionless.]

Comments

Spam

[no_fastolfe]

You give so much of yourself. I fear sometimes it is to your detriment. [She frowns worriedly]

Spam

[toldastory]

[Martha chuckled, but it wasn't a happy sound.] That's what he thinks too.

Spam

[no_fastolfe]

[Perhaps he is right she almost says and feels that it is-- not right, not now.]

What do you feel?

Spam

[toldastory]

I don't know. I really don't.

[Martha whimpered for a moment.]

I don't know. Before I'd say no, and now I don't know.

Spam

[no_fastolfe]

[Vasilia aches for her, reaches out to take one of her hands, the thin plastic glove not blocking the warmth of the other woman's hand.]

I have seen you in such great pain, Martha, at other people's expense. Can you not-- for a while-- think as a Spacer? Look to your own needs. What do you want, for your own sake and nobody else's?

Spam

[toldastory]

I want him. [Martha said the words quickly.] I want to go home. I want not to worry about waking up and turning into a cat or if someone will kill me again. I want not to worry about people doing stupid things.

[A beat.] I need him, and I hate that I've turned into one of those girl who needs a bloke, but I do. I need him like oxygen.

Spam

[no_fastolfe]

It is a dependency I do not like. But-- if it is what you want, and require, Martha, take it. You require him, so take him. Do not allow the lack of him.

[Easier to conceptualize with the man as not necessary support, but a tool for well-being. Perhaps not the way Martha would like to see it, but a dynamic that Vasilia could understand.]

I would-- hate the lack of you. Were you to go. You have been a constant comfort to me. But in this-- it must be to your benefit, Martha. Not mine, not anyone else's.

[Vasilia's eyes gleam with new tears, but these are not the helpless angry ones she shed before. Her own self interest wars with an understanding of must be. But she knows what is right.]

Madam. Look to yourself. Heal yourself, this time.

Spam

[toldastory]

[Martha gave Vasilia's hand a quick squeeze, and her mind had almost already been made up before this had happened. She didn't want to be aboard the Barge without him. The Barge was only tolerable because he was here, and it had been that way for her for far longer than she wanted to admit.

If he wasn't going to stay, then she wasn't going to either. It only took a few nights without him to remind her of why she had things like three am movie clubs and why she overworked herself so badly in the infirmary. Martha had been unhappy for most of her time here, and she didn't want to go back to any of that.]

I think you're right. I have to go.

Spam

[no_fastolfe]

With my blessing, Martha. [Vasilia squeezes back, and lets her go.]

Spam

[toldastory]

Thank you.

[Martha hugged her tightly for a long moment.]

I'll think very highly of you, and miss you.

Re: Spam

[no_fastolfe]

[Vasilia squeezes back tightly]

Entirely mutual, Madam Doctor. Please be well.